Love of a Shade (Scourge's Journal)

Today I was in Seitou's clan's territory. I had decided that it was time to visit AlexanderIsaacs, Jorah, and Daenerys for a little bit which meant I had to perform my duties for the clan. This meant I had to teach. While Jademoon was more than fond of teaching others, I was the only official teacher.

I don't know why Seitou had decided to give me the position as I don't always have the calmest attitude around. If someone makes a mistake I am fine with telling my students exactly what I think. I figure that if they don't learn then they may die by their mistake, this gives me the confidence that my teaching methods are more than justified.

I had spent time figuring out what to teach my students this time and had decided on dealing with the fear of death. Even the ones that wouldn't be warriors needed to learn how to control their fear or end up in the horrible position of my mate. He had gotten better controlling his fear but he still needed constant help the majority of the time.

Alex, my mate, is a deplorable dragon upon first meeting him. He is one of the worst Wildclaws to ever live on Sornieth in that he is a coward that is more concerned about protecting his own hide than the hides of his clanmates. When we first met he experimented on me and eventually I opened up to him.

At first it was because I knew to escape I had to have more information and causing problems for him wouldn't help matters at all. Then I started to realize I liked and admired him for his dark and twisted ways. Ways that might even make the Plaguebringer squirm in disgust.

I think the reason I ended up loving him is that even though I can curse his name, his darkness reflects my own inner turmoil. We are a twisted pairing that works because of our conflict. I did fake my own death when I realized how evil I was becoming. I hid the fact I was alive from him but something called to me and so I rescued his life.

It isn't merely the darkness in him that calls to me, it's the fact that he has more hope than me. He is able to impart some hope into me when all seems lost. I, in turn, make him more courageous as Alex takes more chances when my safety is involved. Since joining Seitou's clan he has gotten better, though his dark nature will never fully go away.

As I finished planning the lesson I wondered if I should force Alex to attend. I wanted him to travel with me and not be stuck here so often. He could argue that his duty was in the clan, but I knew the truth.

Summer rain started to come down and I decided to do some flying. Maybe TobiasFangor and I would see who was the best flyer in any weather.

Scourge's Journal's Table of Contents
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