This is an Animorphs fanfic. The copyright for that series belongs to the copyright holders and not me.
I groaned in pain. The night before I had drank myself drunk. Or something. Words weren't my high point right now. Luckily I had retained enough sense not to go out but I still had to deal with a massive hangover. It took a few minutes but I finally sat on the edge of my bed and looked around.
Currently I was living in a one bedroom apartment with enough space for me and no one else. I didn't need space for anyone else as my other friends, my fellow Animorphs, were more than silent with me. Well, except for Marco.
Ax had gone back to the Andalites. Tobias was not talking to anyone now as the loss of Rachel was too much for him. A death that was all my fault. If only I hadn't...no, I couldn't think about that this early in the morning. My cousin's death would haunt me later today but for now I wanted a few minutes of peace.
Cassie, the love of my life, was helping the Hork-Bajir. After the war they didn't need to remain in the hidden valley. The question then became: where would they move to?
That's what Cassie was helping out with.
Stumbling around I made breakfast. As the smell of leftovers warmed up the kitchen I thought back to Cassie. She hadn't liked killing at all and had remained the only one of us to get out of the war with any sanity. All her moral questions had saved her. Questions that had seemed to slow us all down at the most crucial of times. She had tried to save me.
She had failed.
After eating I held my guilt at bay just long enough to call Cassie. Maybe this time things would be different. Maybe this time I would say the right thing. Maybe...
"Yo, Cassie." I said, doing my best to sound cheerful.
"Jake?" Cassie asked.
I wanted to pretend that her voice was full of happiness. That her voice promised a resolution to our divide. That her voice told me she wanted nothing more than to come back into my arms. The truth was that she sounded more than confused. She also sounded a little annoyed that I had called her. I assumed she had already guessed why I was calling.
Cassie was always clever like that.
"I just wan-" I started.
"Listen, Jake, I know why you're calling." Cassie said, interrupting me. "You're going to tell me something about how you've changed. That you're ready to be the man that you were before we found Elfangor. You have to accept the truth like I have."
"What's that?"
"You've changed too much. I miss our time together and I wish I could use the Time Matrix to change things. But I can't. You can't. We both have to move on and accept we can't go back to the way things were. I've moved on and so should you."
How could she say those things? During the war we were so close. During the war we were a couple. When we kissed the first time we destroyed the Howlers. Now she wouldn't even think of us getting back together again. Every call I had made to her she never once told me she would consider the idea of us being a couple again.
"I want to marry you." I said in a voice that was more than pathetic to my ears. "Please, Cassie, just give me another chance. I love you. What do you want me to do? I'll do whatever you want me to. Just...just...just come back to me."
Cassie paused so long that I began to hope she would become my girlfriend again. That she would agree to become my wife. That our time apart would finally be over. Finally I could find some peace after so much pain. After making so many wrong decisions over the war. After losing Tom.
"I'm not getting back with you, Jake." Cassie said, breaking the silence. "I'm seeing someone else. I'm not breaking up with him to be with you. You need to move on."
With that she hung up.
Tears were streaming from my eyes and I could hardly think. Maybe Cassie would break up with her new boyfriend. Maybe there was still a chance for us. Or maybe she was right. Maybe I had to move on.
After my tears had stopped, I looked around and found the letter. For a long time I had been avoiding it and sending the US Government a reply. I hadn't wanted to do anything, especially something concerning the military.
"Maybe it is time I move on." I said with a sigh.
Moving on, in this case, meant training a new special ops team with the morphing power. They said it was to combat terrorism. Maybe doing this I could move on. I would never have to fight again, only train people. I wouldn't have to make another hard decision in my life.
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