Saturday, February 4, 2017

Crossing the Divide 35

"You haven't spoken much." Alex said and I turned to see him enter the tent.

"Daenerys betrayed me." I told him. "I lost Jeor. There is not much use for words anymore."

Alex sat on the edge of the cot and ran a hand through my hair. His simple touch calmed me and I shut my eyes. For a blessed moment it was as if everything was perfect. That all the pains of the world had gone away and left me in peace. I had been surviving on these moments for the past few days. Holding onto them as if my life depended on them. Maybe it did now. Maybe this was the pain I would feel until I died centuries from now.

"Do you know what I thought when I first saw you?" Alex asked and I opened my eyes to look into his. "I knew you were different than anything I had seen before. I knew you would mean more for me but I didn't know what that meant. I hadn't yet experienced those feelings so how could I? You turned out to be one of the bravest people I had ever met."

"I'm not brave." I told him. "I was broken and I ran."

"You gave me another chance after everything I did. If that's not bravery, what is? You will find your strength and you will defeat Daenerys."

"I don't know if I want to. I saved her life and in return...she unleashed every hell in existence. I sacrificed myself for a woman who deserved no mercy."

I had run away from my fears. As my anguish took hold of me I realized I had been running for a very long time. After my pack died I hadn't been strong enough to carry on and form a new family. There were direwolves that had been more than ready to follow me. I had run away from the kindness of the Raqus family, for the most part, as living that life was scary to me. When I had made love to Jorah for the first time I had run away to a new reality. It was scary but I hadn't had to deal with the fear of falling in love for the first time. Now when Daenerys had betrayed me I had run away to a different sort of reality in Essos. I didn't understand it, not yet, but I thought of spending my life there. As long as I didn't have to face the reality where my former queen betrayed me.

"I know what it's like being a coward." Alex said. "And you are not one."

-This is a Mature Story (if in content if not plot)
-It's a Game of Thrones/Resident Evil Fic
-It's a Doctor Isaacs Fic

You can read it HERE

No comments:

Post a Comment