Friday, April 1, 2016

Inbetween: Akin to the Platypus 9

Fic Or Original: Fic

Fandom(s): Animorphs and The Avengers

Rating: T (as according to ffnet)

Characters In Chapter: Tobias and Bruce Banner

Relationships:Tobias/Bruce Banner

I couldn't help but squint as I walked through Avengers Tower. Luckily there weren't too many people near where I was now. I was away from the area where workers would usually be. Where was I?

The rooms. Tony had talked about eventually all the Avengers staying here, but for now it was only Tony, Bruce, Pepper, and myself. Which meant this area was extremely quiet unless Tony was more bored than usual.

I wanted to be human now so that entering Bruce's room would be easier. I mean, just getting to the room as a hawk would be near impossible.

Walking to Bruce's room as a human also allowed me to go over my decision. It was a wrong and gross decision, but it felt like the only right decision to me. Yes, I could be friends with Bruce but our friendship called for something more.

Where else would I find myself such a perfect partner? My situation wasn't one you came across every day and to find someone dealing with my problems seemed like a miracle. Almost like the universe had offered me a little relief while my life was going to Hell.

Shakily I knocked on Bruce's door. Part of me couldn't wait to tell him my feelings while the other part was afraid of them.

Did I really want him to say yes?

"Wait." Bruce said and a minute later he opened the door.

When he opened the door I was glad I didn't have my hawk eyes. To see such perfection with human eyes was enough. I felt myself losing control. Maybe being human allowed me to be more attracted to humans?

"Did you want something?" Bruce asked after a moment of silence.

"Oh, er...um...yeah...can I come in?" I replied and Bruce nodded.

I stood a few feet away from his bed and thought about how I'd word the conversation.

"I feel like an outsider." I finally said. "I'm...I don't know what I am. I used to think I was a boy trapped as a hawk but it's all become more complicated than that."

Bruce sat down on his bed and patted the spot beside him, but I shook my head. If I accepted the offer I would lose the last bit of sanity I had. I would kiss Bruce and then both of us would be embarrassed. That was no way to start a relationship.

"Don't you think of your friends as family?" Bruce asked.

I would've made a joke about him trying to play psychiatrist but that would be cruel. He was going above and beyond his limits to help me now.

"I don't know what family is. I didn't exactly have a childhood before the war." I told him. "I guess they're family. I mean, they're all I have to hang onto. I have no one else to turn to."

"I guess I didn't have an easy childhood." Bruce replied. "I was abused by my father. When people like Tony talk about their fathers I just can't understand that."

"I was abused emotionally by my aunt and physically by my uncle. Both didn't give two shits about me."

There was a moment of silence as we shared a similar pain. My own parents had never been there for me. My father had left and my mother had died in a car crash.

"I would've liked to have known my mom." I finally said. "She died in a car crash."

"What about your father?" Bruce asked.

"Him? He left me and my mother. I'm not going to go after someone who left me."

Bruce nodded and I was glad he wasn't blaming me for my feelings. I wished I was in hawk form so that he could scratch behind my head, a touch I would've loved right now but wouldn't make sense as I was in human form.

"At least you're part of your team, unlike me." Bruce replied sadly. "I'm too unpredictable and when I change I can't be controlled. I'm never me when I fight, I'm something else."

"You're not just a monster, Bruce, you're more than that." I said as I avoided looking in his eyes. "You're smart and intelligent. The Avengers need you for that part of you."

"But that could change in a moment."

"Maybe if you accepted the Hulk more you could control it. With the hawk side of me...once I accepted it I became more at peace. More able to live my life. It wasn't like before but at least I wasn't in so much pain."

"But you're still in pain?"

"That's never going to change. I'm too hurt. I'm too broken. But at least I'm able to go days at a time without feeling dead inside."

There was silence as Bruce chuckled and ruffled the hair on my head. His touch was so much more than comforting.

"You're not broken, Tobias." Bruce said kindly.

"Neither are you." I told him.

For a moment I felt drawn to his lips. For a moment there was no thought of Rachel as I thought of letting him touch every inch of me. I wanted him and every part of my body was waiting for me to kiss him, to let him know I wanted him.

But that moment passed and I was embarrassed I had thought those things. So what if I came here to fuck him, that didn't make the thoughts right. Didn't mean I had to do what I originally intended to, I could always change my mind.

"Do you really want to go back?" Bruce said, a sadness in his voice.

"I have to go back." I said, even as I wasn't sure about my choice. "If I don't go , I'll be leaving my friends. I'll be letting them die without doing anything."

"And Rachel."

"Yeah, I can't leave her alone."

Was there jealousy in his voice? Was he jealous of her? Why did that make me happy?

I started to leave his room and then turned to look at him.

"Actually, I don't know." I said, quickly leaving.
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