Saturday, September 14, 2019

The Pull of Fate Chapter 12: Failure

This is a Game of Thrones fic. All rights belong to the copyright holders.

This chapter has been edited due to content. If you want to see the unedited version GO HERE.


Jon Stark

Ghost and Nymeria were playing with each other just near the edge of the courtyard. Though if a person didn't know about direwolves, they looked like they were trying to kill each other. I watched them in the uncomfortable seat that had been prepared for me. Arya sat next to me in an equally uncomfortable chair. Soon my attention would have to go from the direwolves to the people trying out to be tutors. My lover would have avoided this occasion but she would be needed. Maybe if she saw how integral to Winterfell she was then she would decide to marry me.

Or maybe I would have to accept that Arya was too wild to settle down. Maybe I would have to accept that loving her was like loving the snow. She would be here one season and then gone the rest. All I could do was rejoice in the time I had with her and not ask for anything else. Or maybe I could keep showing her another way of life and she would stay with me forever. The months she was gone made me feel empty, I needed her by my side.

"I don't think many will come today." Arya said and held back a yawn. "You're asking loyal Northerners to help the Queen of the South. Since we already sent others it's highly unlikely anyone will want to make the journey to King's Landing."

"You're right." I replied reluctantly. "But maybe one of the few will be good enough to tutor Sarisa."

"You have to learn not to hold so tightly on things, brother. Somethings can't be changed and you have to live with that."
I had a suspicion Arya wasn't talking just about the tryouts that would occur in the courtyard soon. No, she was talking about another matter entirely. She knew how much I wanted her to be queen. She knew that I had not pursued any other woman to be my queen. What if I failed to change? Would she leave my side forever? Would she never return to Winterfell again if I tried to control her too much?

"No, they can't." I replied nervously. "But can you blame me for trying?"

"I wish I could." Arya said with a faint smile. "I wish I could accept what was and go away. Only visiting on your namesday or whenever duty called me here. If you died and you still hadn't decided on a wife or left no heir, I would be Queen of Winterfell. I prefer freedom but would never betray my own blood."

I looked into her eyes and saw fear in the depths of them. When we had grown up, she hadn't had any interest in ******* or being like a lady. Unlike Sansa, Arya had never swooned at ballads about what noble knights would do for the woman they loved. Instead she adored archery and sword play. The battlefield had always been her home, but now she saw another side of her opening up and it scared her.

"I am glad that if I die alone, you will be there for me." I said. "That's all I can ask of you."

There were sounds of footsteps and I turned at the three people aiming to become tutors for my daughter. Only one could go down South and hopefully one of these three would be good enough to trust with my daughter's education. All three walked with purpose which made me hope that this would work out. Though it was highly likely none of them were right for the position. Sansa's voice came in my head telling me that it would be so easy to send an assassin this way. No, I couldn't allow that level of political scheming to affect me.

The first to stand in front of me was a woman with messy brown hair. It was extremely clear that she was a lowborn that had decided it wasn't important to get washed for me. Her unkempt appearance and stench could be a statement to me about her not agreeing about helping the South. It could be equally true that this was the best way she was able to present herself. It could be that once given the ability to wash well she could be the most stunning beauty in all of Westeros.

The second to stand in front of me was a man that was well into his middle ages. In height and stature, he was nearly like Jorah Mormont. Though the King of the South had sharper cheekbones, bluer eyes, and kindness in his most intense scowls. Also unlike Jorah, this man appeared to not be a good fighter. He had numerous burns on his hands and arms that seemed to relate to his profession. Maybe this man wouldn't be a good fighter, but it seemed highly likely he was patient due to being a blacksmith.

The third was a man that was both fat and well kept. This must mean he was of a higher position than the other two. Yet he was still a lowborn by the fact his clothing was of a lesser quality than any Lord or Lady would wear. Hopefully his weight was not a problem while fighting, though if he had been wielding a war hammer I would've had more faith. That weapon rewarded those who had enough force with victories. Instead this man had a sword on his hip.

I looked at Arya and saw her finishing evaluating the men. Of course only lowborns would have answered my calls. The Northern Lords and ladies had their pride to consider. Helping the Queen of South would mean they thought of her as anything but a necessary evil. Lowborns, on the other hand, would see my offer as a way to go up in the world. Being a tutor to a future ruler could mean being showered with wealth that was beyond their comprehension. Maybe if they followed wealth more than honor, they would never return to the North. Maybe they would even travel to Essos to make more money there.

"Thank you for heeding my call." I said and stood up. "I am more than proud to see you standing before me. However, Sarisa Targaryen is only one child and needs just one tutor. I can only choose one of you. That is if you are fit to be her tutor."

"Won't you be calling for more tutors?" The second man asked. "The Targaryen seems to have you under her thumb."

"I didn't lie when I said this would be the last time. While our kingdoms are enjoying a time of peace, I am not so naive to think this calm will last endless generations. If the heir to the Iron Throne scares off every tutor, I will feel no guilt if the South crumbles. For your speech implying that I am not loyal to the North, my home, you will have the honor of facing Arya Stark. Unlike the others, she will not make allowances for your lack of skill."
It was odd to remember that I was not a bastard. That I held the title of King of the North. That if I so chose, I could silence anyone for speaking out against me. It had taken my mind awhile to catch up with my rank. It wouldn't do to allow lowborns, or anyone else, to question my allegiances. I could not have others thinking I was weak. If the Lords and Ladies of the North thought I was weak enough, House Stark could lose its standing in Westeros. It wouldn't be my destiny to dishonor my ancestors so.

Arya stood up gracefully from her seat. She walked with a gait that was self-assured but, at the same time, wasn't vain. She knew exactly what she could do and felt no need to impress anyone. If others were to feel fear in her presence, that wasn't her concern. The man who had insulted me grew pale as my sister walked towards him. Her accomplishments were known throughout Westeros and to face her blade was not to be undertaken lightly.

She took out Needle and he imitated her movements. Though she seemed to be a different breed than him. The moment I sat down and the other two moved behind me, Arya faced off with the man. The man could not finish one movement before backing away from my cousin's attacks. I wanted to keep a grin of satisfaction off my face, but I was not that strong. Luckily he did not have time to look at me before my expression changed.

"You have done a formidable job." I said once the man finished and then turned my attention on the people behind me.

For the other two Arya did not go at them with her full strength. This allowed the others to show more strategy than the man who insulted me was allowed to showcase. It was cruel of me to treat him so, but it was something that had to be done. Sansa would have reprimanded me if she had heard my thoughts at this moment. It was her strength and wit that had helped House Baratheon to begin to rebuild itself.

After sparring with the three, Arya took her seat. It appeared as if she had only gone on a short walk. The three looking to tutor my daughter looked extremely different. The man resembling Jorah had a few new cuts that hadn't been on him before. His eyes did their best to avoid mine and I knew then he would not return home with tales about how Jon Stark was a weak king. The woman looked extremely tired and was doing her best to act like she wasn't worn out. The fat man looked the worst out of all of them and his eyes begged me to allow him to sit.

"I know you all must be tired." I said and looked briefly at the fat man. "However, there is one last part before I take time to decide who to send South as a tutor. I need to make sure your mind is as sharp as your body."

The questions started simple and focused on the history of Winterfell, which meant a heavy focus on House Stark. There was confusion on their faces when I asked that they didn't try to make the Battle of Winterfell other than a disaster. They must have thought I'd want them to glorify my home beyond reason. For a time this place had been abandoned until it was rebuilt by House Targaryen.

"So you want us to like the Targaryens?" The woman asked. "At the expense of our loyalty to you?"

"No, I want you to be aware of what they have done. The good and the bad. As with everyone in Westerosi history."

The questions eventually went over the major eras of history. I had gone over with a maester about the questions I was asking today. I had learned more about the North than I had before. I had bent the knee to Daenerys Targaryen because she was a good woman, would I have done the same if Aegon had threatened the entire North? Was there an actual difference between the two? Sacrificing freedom for safety or as a reward ended with the same results. If not for my aunt's kindness I would've been remembered for giving the North back to the Targaryens.

"What is dead will never die." The fat man said in response to the last question.

I nodded in reply. Everyone had answered the questions well enough. If they were asked while traveling they would be knowledgeable to any passing traveler. But being just good enough wasn't what Sarisa needed. She needed a tutor that could make her into an extremely wise ruler that would lead the South through another generation of peace. I didn't think any here were smart enough to give my daughter a good future. Or maybe I was just biased.

"You may take rest in Winterfell until a decision is made." I said and stood up as the three bowed to me.
Arya lead them to their rooms where they would find luxury until a decision was made. It would be agony, I thought, for them to be taken out of paradise and return to their lives. All their needs would be met here while at home it looked like they sometimes went lacking for months at a time.

While thinking about them, I walked to the godswood. There was activity as people kept to their daily duties and some children nearly bumped into me. What a great thing it would have been to have Sarisa here. No matter how hard it was raising her, it would feel good to have a child of my own. What would Arya be like as a mother? Would her cold demeanor open up for her own blood?

I closed my eyes once I sat in front of the heart tree. Those were the final tutors to choose from for my daughter. This would be the last time I could be involved in her life. The last time she would hear from me unless politics intertwined both of our lives together. If a war raged throughout of all Westeros we would have to fight together to stop evil from spreading. I grinned at the thought of fighting side by side with my daughter.

"You ran away." Arya said and sat next to me.

"Was that a smart move?" I asked her.

"The one who spoke against you wouldn't stop apologizing to me. He even asked when we would be married. I don't need to avenge anyone, but I can't be trapped in one place. I can't be restricted. Even now Nymeria is begging to run free and I want to go with her. She won't go without me in any case. I don't know how you stay trapped here."

"I don't think of myself as being restrained like you do. It would be more straining to wander the countryside as so many benefit from my rule. Every day I'm not making decisions is a day unneeded deaths can occur."

What it would to be free like she could be. No one asking for my help would be paradise. For now I couldn't push away my responsibility no matter how much pain it caused me. Arya was like a hawk, lovely to look at yet would be pathetic in a cage. I should stop my pursuit of her and look for another queen, but something in my blood called me to her.

"Do you think any of the people are suitable for my daughter, Arya." I asked my cousin.

"I'm sure they can be taught manners that would be considered proper in the South." Arya said after thinking for a moment. "I wouldn't trust any of them to be able to fight off an attacker. Anyone sent to assassinate Sarisa would know what they're doing. They might be a Faceless Man."

"What about training Sarisa to fight?"

"It wouldn't be a skill she'd need being a girl. I think they could train her well enough to fight in a tournament, but not an actual battle."

I grinned at the barely controlled rage in Arya's voice. The only ones to truly encourage her need to fight when she was younger were myself and our father. He hired someone to train her while I gave her Needle. She had gone against her destiny to get what she wanted. I wouldn't put it past her to yell at the gods and for them to tremble in fear.
"Maybe Daenerys and Jorah can get someone else to train her." I suggested. "I admit them being competent fighters is not something needed. My daughter will have guards of her own to protect her."

"It's better for everyone if she can defend herself." Arya argued. "Sarisa doesn't have to be a warrior queen, just better than the three that want to be her tutor."

"Could you train any of them if they are to go South?"

"If I must, yes. But I won't go easy on them if I am tasked with their training."

"I would expect nothing less."

The wind blew through the trees and I could hear our wolves howling in the distance. If only I was not restrained by responsibilities I could travel with Arya. Maybe then, without the need to stay in one place, we could marry and have children. We would become as wild as any animal and noble as any direwolf. I smiled. If only.

"I think they sounded smart." Arya said after a moment's silence.

"They didn't sound intelligent enough." I retorted. "They can recite basic facts, but they seem hardly able to do much more than that."

"Doesn't a tutor just have to recite information?"

"Yes, but we have to look at this tutor as a last resort. If Sarisa opens up to them then it isn't likely that another tutor can replace them. If she hadn't scared so many people off, there would be more people to choose from in the future."

"We can't exactly send her a maester, though one of them will be intelligent enough to be a tutor."

"We are agreed that none of them will be her tutor."

"And you're perfectly okay with not sending help to your aunt ever again?"

I nodded though I was conflicted. There would always be a part of me that longed to be with my daughter. That longed to hold her in my arms when she was sad or when I had to carry her back to bed. I wanted to do everything to make sure she was safe, but that wasn't possible. Daenerys and I had decided to stop sleeping with each other. I was now King of the North and couldn't let my heart dictate my actions. Especially those that called me to move to King's Landing to make sure she was having a good childhood. And to see someone I missed more than I would tell anyone except Arya.

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