This chapter has been edited due to content. I edited a sex scene to only plot relevant dialogue. If you want to see the unedited version GO HERE.
"Your Grace," The guard said. "Ser Jaime Lannister is at the gate."
"Let him in." I replied curtly.
"He has requested to speak with you or Jon immediately."
I nodded in understanding. Jon was riding Rhaegal as there was nothing else to do and he needed the practice. I also needed the practice but fear was holding me back. Fear I wanted to keep.
I followed the guard from the courtyard to where Jaime was waiting. He hadn't moved far from the gate. His eyes revealed none of the emotions he was feeling. If the Lannister were here then that could only mean that his sister was dead. Maybe Khaleesi would know what the man was feeling, but I didn't. I had been gifted with a loving family and couldn't imagine killing any of them. It still pained me that my father had died without me by his side. Though that might have been how he wanted it.
"Have you succeeded in your mission?" I asked after I had waved the guard away.
"Yes." Jaime replied with some sadness to his voice. "It was more than easy to kill my sister. She believed me when I said I had returned to her. That siding with you had been a mistake. Getting her alone took no effort at all. The only problem was killing the Mountain. It was only by a stroke of luck that the fire started and ended up killing him."
"How did you get out of King's Landing?"
"With Cersei and the Mountain dead, the people had no reason to act against me. All had feared and loathed Cersei. Only a few actually admired her. The Iron Throne is ready for Jon when he goes to claim it. There was none that dared contest the King's birthright."
"You have done good work. Myself and Jon thank you for your service."
"And you just believe me?"
"If you had betrayed us, Cersei would not let you come here alone. She would've had you lead an army here. From what I've learned of your sister, she is not a subtle woman."
"That she is not."
Jaime needed no order to follow me once I started to walk. Another training session, this time lead by Brienne of Tarth and Bronn, was taking place so Winterfell was quiet. The common people who had found shelter here didn't cause much noise. As time had gone on they had become more scared of the dead. Every moment could be the last they would have. It was a fear that tore away at them. There was not much I could do and so I continued my walk with Jaime.
"Things have happened since you were away." I told Jaime as we walked. "Jon has revealed his true heritage to the people. There was some commotion but it was quickly resolved. The North does admire him to the point his Targaryen blood didn't cause a rebellion."
"And there is the fact of a common enemy." Jaime pointed out. "Or do you Northerners care more for your pride?"
"Pride is what helps keep us warm."
"Tyrion is right. Sometimes people can't tell if you're joking."
For a moment I too wondered if I were joking. When the words had come out of my mouth they had seemed mere sounds of jest. But now I thought differently. Us Northerners were tied very much to our pride. At times it seemed we had never truly joined the Seven Kingdoms and were only looking for our chance at breaking away. Yet now I sat on the Iron Throne with my husband Jon Stark.
"Is there any other news?" Jaime asked after a moment.
"We are finally making use of the dragonglass Jon mined at Dragonstone." I replied. "Bran has been able to use his greensight to see back to when Valyrian steel was perfected. It took a few days for him to figure out when that took place."
"If he can see so far back in the past, why not go to when the White Walkers were first defeated? It would help with strategy."
"And what if the Night King is powerful enough to sense Bran doing such a thing? What if the Night King has already anticipated Bran doing such a thing and so has changed their strategy? What if he could erase his original weakness?"
"So it is pointless to do so."
It had taken up a large portion of a meeting to come to that conclusion. All of us had hoped that there would be a simple solution to this war but that wasn't the case. From what I had seen in life, simplicity wasn't possible.
"I assume the cripple isn't also a blacksmith." Jaime said.
"No, he isn't." I replied and ignored the slight against Bran. "Gendry has proved himself a very good blacksmith. The Valyrian steel needs a unique element to be properly forged. Luckily we have Rhaegal to grant us dragonfire. Making each blade is dangerous and tiring. It is a testament to Gendry's skill that he has made many Valyrian blades."
"And how many has he made?"
"Not enough. We have made sure that those of high enough rank and skill have Valyrian blades. We have had to resort to giving people weapons tipped with dragonglass and Valyrian steel."
"So the common people will be defenseless?"
"Not entirely. Some of the common people have shown enough skill to be given dragonglass daggers. We have done our best to give any group at least one or two people with the proper weapons."
Every time I had to defend these decisions I felt horrible. It didn't matter that war left no one with clean hands. It mattered that there were people without the weapons that could kill the dead. Thousands could die and it would be my fault. I was one of the two kings and so every death fell on my shoulders.
"You're doing what you can." Jaime said as if he could read my guilt. "Valyrian steel was always hard to make. The fact you have had so many made shows your commitment. Thousands will live because of your decisions."
"Your Grace." A man said with a bow. "Ser Jaime. Jorah, there are preparations to be dealt with."
"Jaime should see first hand what has happened since he left." I replied.
My duties would've felt mundane if not for the fact the dead were coming. If one thing was done the wrong way then many could die. Still my body was torn by fear just as fiercely as it would've been by boredom. The most stressful thing to be dealt with was Gendry's status on making Valyrian blades. There never seemed to be enough.
As I did my duties as king I thought to how things would be after the war. Spring would be much hotter in King's Landing than in Winterfell. It might take a few months but Jon would become used to the weather. Maybe he would learn to not wear his furs in the thick of summer. It would be a sight to see him sweat heavily as he tried desperately to keep his furs on. It would probably take him passing out once or twice to get him to change his ways.
It would be hard for either of us to visit the North. We would be busy with our own work of running the kingdom. That included making an heir. While Sansa favored just having sex with me to make a child, it would be better to share a woman. The thought of three bodies tangled together nearly distracted me from my duty. I was able to drive the images away but couldn't get rid of the taste.
"Have I done something wrong?" A young man asked.
"No, you haven't." I replied. "With such a vicious cold that hasn't been seen for many generations, it was always likely we would lose some food. Just remember to be more careful in the future. We can't win the war if we starve to death."
Rations. That's what my mouth was talking about and ears were hearing. Some of the food had been ruined from a combination of cold and poor conditions. The latter was the thing to focus on as it could be fixed. The young man's father nearly fell over in relief. They both knew that being on a king's bad side wasn't the way to live.
The hours both rushed and dragged by. Everything was important but extremely tedious. Jaime nearly dosed off at one point but he refused to leave. Most likely due to the fact he needed to know what was going on. He was nearly as good with strategy as Tyrion was. But he was only a good strategist due to the knowledge he had before any fighting took place. The only way to gain such information was to learn it. In some cases it could be extremely boring.
After an eternity I was finally able to go back to my room. The fireplace was home to a comforting fire. I sat in one of the chairs and watched as the flames licked the air before disappearing. At times it appeared as though snakes were trying to escape but to no avail. They were trapped in the flames until the fire died.
My eyes could not decided whether they wanted to stay open or not. For a reason unknown to me I fought sleep. For some reason I wanted to stay awake even though now was a time to relax. When the fighting started again there might not be a chance like this for awhile. Then my days would be full of worrying that the dead would win.
Each day of calm allowed me to think that the dead weren't coming. That the dead would never be able to break through the Wall. But that hope could turn deadly if followed through. I had already allowed my hope of never riding Drogon to take over. Since the day I touched him, I hadn't gone near the creature. There was a hope in me that I would never have to ride him. The only thing comforting about that fear was it wasn't selfish. It was about honor.
That didn't make it any less dangerous for me to forgo riding Drogon. His flames were much more deadly than those in the fireplace. His breath could help imbue Valyrian steel with the qualities it was infamous for. It could be he was too proud to help forge Valyrian steel and so had Rhaegal do the deed.
The door opened and I turned to see Jon enter. He looked more tired and worn than I had seen him in quite some time. He was strong when others were watching but that armor didn't need to be worn around me. He sat in the chair that was beside my own. He closed his eyes and I allowed him his silence.
"Jaime arrived." Jon said, breaking the silence. "Could killing Cersei really be that easy?"
"He has no reason to lie about that." I told him. "To you or I such a deed would be near impossible. She doesn't respect either of us. She doesn't respect her twin as a person, but she does love him in her own way. When we love someone we don't see all the negative qualities about them. It makes it easier for betrayal to come from that direction."
"I'm glad I don't have to worry about that from you."
"No, we don't have her faults. Traitors may come in the future but never from your family."
"Or the man I married."
Jon reached out his hand to me and I took it. It felt young yet worn. My love had been told all his life he was a mere bastard. That his blood made him something to be scoffed at. Yet he had risen from that upbringing. If I were put in his position would I gain such strength or would I be consumed by rage? Would I hate the world and want it to burn? It was a blessing that possibility had never been presented to me.
"Winterfell won't remain safe." Jon said. "This place is unique. It is also the place where I was raised. The Night King won't let it stand."
"The Night King may try to tear it down, but he won't be able to." I tried to reassure Jon. "Those who are here will remain safe."
"You're not usually one to lie, Jorah."
"You need to remain calm. You can't think too much of the future. I don't want to see you become unhinged. This train of thought will lead you to other scenarios. You can't allow that to happen."
"So you don't think of me dying?"
"I think of myself dying and leaving you alone more often than anything. Even if I live through this war, I am not a young man. But I don't let that fear rule me. I take one day at a time. I take every moment with you as something special."
Jon looked more than worried by those words. I hoped that what I said would allow him to realize worrying wouldn't help at this moment. At meetings when strategy was being discussed was the time fear was acceptable. It allowed all of us to focus on how to survive. But now, in a room that was filled with the colors of sunset, was a time to relax. Was a time to gather strength for the next battle.
"Do you worry about Bear Island?" Jon asked. "If the Night King has Viserion then he could burn your home to the ground. A dragon is magical and could allow him to pass over water."
"It hasn't happened yet." I replied.
In the back of my mind I was furious for the image he had planted in my mind. Lyanna had been cursed with her position because of me. One so young and wronged shouldn't die. However, worrying now wouldn't do any good. I was Azor Ahai and needed to win this war. I was the only one who could win this war.
Jon would continue this conversation until the sun rose again. I stood up from my chair and kneeled in front of him. He was a handsome man that life would continue to shape into something even more beautiful. His hand went through my hair and I closed my eyes. My heart rate increased as did my love's breathing. He knew very well why I was poised like this.
There was something special to this lovemaking session. For the first time he truly took control.
Before I could try for another round, my love exited me and fell asleep on the bed. All the stresses of his life had finally taken their toll.
A smile was on his sleeping face as I tucked him in and then lay beside him. His warmth was the only thing that was needed to keep my body warm. My body was racked with exhaustion yet I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to look at my husband's sleeping form for as long as I could.
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