Title: Salt
Director: Phillip Noyce
Cut: Extended Unrated Cut
Starring: Angelina Jolie, Liev Schreiber, and Chiwetel Ejiofor
Rated: Unrated
Released: 2010
Rating: 1.5/5
Oscars: Nominated for 1
Basic Plot: Salt goes on the run after she is accused of being a Russian spy.
The Film is Confused
I am fine with films that force me to think about things. But Salt is a film that seems to not know what to do with itself. While the action sequences are great, it has confused plotlines. I think this is due to the fact that it wanted too many twists than it could really handle.
Who is Salt?
The question that was used to promote the movie just seems stupid. Even if you do watch the movie. You quickly find out the answer to that question. In other words, watching the whole movie to find out the question is just stupid.
The Action Sequences
The only good thing about the movie is the action sequences. They were the only enjoyable thing about this film. While the good and bad guys can get confused (not in a good way, trust me), if you just focus on the action it seems like a decent film. If the film hadn't tried so hard to do plot twists, I could've recommended this movie as a mindless action flick.
Final Thoughts
This film is a big piece of shit. I love bad movies and will search out bad movies. Heck, I've probably watched more bad movies than good (and don't regret it). But I like bad movies that are fun to watch. However, Salt tests my patience so I couldn't enjoy it. This is a movie you should stay the heck away from.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
What song do you sing in the shower?
Any song I happen to like at the moment. Don't have one theme shower song.
Friday, October 7, 2011
Splice (Part 3)
This video focuses mainly on Elsa's relation to Dren.
If that version doesn't work, try this one:
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
S&N: Curse Revealed 3
S&N: Curse Revealed 3
NOTE: NAZILLA IS A FEMALE!
After a few minutes of silence I bent down to pick up Samara's groceries. As I picked them up she just stood still and silent while looking at me. I didn't blame her. I sometimes had trouble looking at myself in the mirror, so I couldn't say anything bad against her reaction. Also, she had seen me die in her arms and now she was looking at a robot version of me.
Finally I finished picking up the groceries and handed them to her. Her reaction of taking the groceries from me was more robotic than I could ever be.
"Samara, it's good to see you." I said after I decided someone would have to break the silence.
Samara looked at me oddly and I thought that she wasn't going to speak. "You're not Nazilla. You're not my girlfriend." She walked away from me and went into the kitchen.
"If you'll let me, I'll explain." I said as I went after her.
As soon as Samara put down her groceries she held a gun to my face. "Stop pretending to be her!" She yelled. "You can't be her! She's dead!"
I thought a moment before saying, "What if I am Nazilla? Wouldn't you like to make sure?"
Samara lowered her gun. "I'll let you explain and then I'll kill you. I think I can do that and not die."
With that I sat at the kitchen table and waited as Samara made tea. She seemed like an angel as she moved around. Seeing Samara make tea made it seem as though the past three years had never happened. It made my suffering and change seem like nothing. As long as I could see her I'd be close enough to Heaven to satisfy me. When she sat down and gave me tea the anger of God shot through her eyes to me.
"So how can you be Nazilla?" Samara asked and sipped her tea to cover up the hope in her voice.
"After I died, Netty took my body and transferred my brain's knowledge to a chip." I explained.
"Why would they want to make a Machine who was once a human?" She asked.
"There are some things that a human can know that a Machine could never understand. Some things are impossible to know by just being told."
"If that's true, then don't you have programming in you besides what Netty got from your brain."
"Yes, there was. I managed to find a way to put it in the background after three years. It won't affect me anymore."
"Prove it." As she said that I had a crazy idea that I had wanted to do to her for three years. I slowly walked over and showed Samara I wasn't going to harm her. Then I gave her a kiss like I had given her before I was made into a Machine.
When I finished the kiss and backed away, I saw Samara's face change. She smiled but then quickly took on a stoic look.
She got up quickly and said, "You will sleep alone tonight. I trust you are Nazilla, but not that your programming won't make you try and kill me." She got up and went to her room.
Well, at least I could be in Samara's life again. That was the most I could hope for.
NOTE: NAZILLA IS A FEMALE!
After a few minutes of silence I bent down to pick up Samara's groceries. As I picked them up she just stood still and silent while looking at me. I didn't blame her. I sometimes had trouble looking at myself in the mirror, so I couldn't say anything bad against her reaction. Also, she had seen me die in her arms and now she was looking at a robot version of me.
Finally I finished picking up the groceries and handed them to her. Her reaction of taking the groceries from me was more robotic than I could ever be.
"Samara, it's good to see you." I said after I decided someone would have to break the silence.
Samara looked at me oddly and I thought that she wasn't going to speak. "You're not Nazilla. You're not my girlfriend." She walked away from me and went into the kitchen.
"If you'll let me, I'll explain." I said as I went after her.
As soon as Samara put down her groceries she held a gun to my face. "Stop pretending to be her!" She yelled. "You can't be her! She's dead!"
I thought a moment before saying, "What if I am Nazilla? Wouldn't you like to make sure?"
Samara lowered her gun. "I'll let you explain and then I'll kill you. I think I can do that and not die."
With that I sat at the kitchen table and waited as Samara made tea. She seemed like an angel as she moved around. Seeing Samara make tea made it seem as though the past three years had never happened. It made my suffering and change seem like nothing. As long as I could see her I'd be close enough to Heaven to satisfy me. When she sat down and gave me tea the anger of God shot through her eyes to me.
"So how can you be Nazilla?" Samara asked and sipped her tea to cover up the hope in her voice.
"After I died, Netty took my body and transferred my brain's knowledge to a chip." I explained.
"Why would they want to make a Machine who was once a human?" She asked.
"There are some things that a human can know that a Machine could never understand. Some things are impossible to know by just being told."
"If that's true, then don't you have programming in you besides what Netty got from your brain."
"Yes, there was. I managed to find a way to put it in the background after three years. It won't affect me anymore."
"Prove it." As she said that I had a crazy idea that I had wanted to do to her for three years. I slowly walked over and showed Samara I wasn't going to harm her. Then I gave her a kiss like I had given her before I was made into a Machine.
When I finished the kiss and backed away, I saw Samara's face change. She smiled but then quickly took on a stoic look.
She got up quickly and said, "You will sleep alone tonight. I trust you are Nazilla, but not that your programming won't make you try and kill me." She got up and went to her room.
Well, at least I could be in Samara's life again. That was the most I could hope for.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Unknown (2011)
Title: Unknown
Director: Jaume Collet-Serra
Based on the Novel: Out of My Head
Written By: Didier Van Cauwelaert
Starring: Liam Neeson, Diane Kruger, and January Jones
Rated: PG-13
Released: 2011
Rating: 4/5
Oscars: N/A
Basic Plot: Dr. Martin Harris (Liam Neeson) wakes up with his life being stolen from him and no one believes what he says.
Who Harris Actually Is
The payoff for finding out who Harris is does make sense in the end. The character of Harris is shown to be somewhat simple, he's a biochemist, but it turns out there is a reason he was able to do the cool stuff before he found out. What makes it interesting to me is that it involves something to do with the mind.
Corn
What is it that Harris has to make sure doesn't get into the wrong hands? Corn that can grow in any weather. I felt it was such a let down as the rest of the movie was kick ass. It does make sense why that's a target but it wasn't as good as what could have been.
Liam Neeson's Performance
His performance in this movie was very good. He did a good job as Harris and also when his character changed. Liam is a very good action star as well as showing real emotions and this mixes well. The brief clips of him having sex with his wife in the shower seemed a little weird to put in this movie.
Final Thoughts
This is a very well done movie. It is great on the action and the plot is engaging. It keeps you guessing until the end. Unknown is a mystery but those who want a little romance (no, I'm not referring just to Harris' wife) and action (the action scenes are done very well). Liam Neeson fans should be pleased with this movie.
Director: Jaume Collet-Serra
Based on the Novel: Out of My Head
Written By: Didier Van Cauwelaert
Starring: Liam Neeson, Diane Kruger, and January Jones
Rated: PG-13
Released: 2011
Rating: 4/5
Oscars: N/A
Basic Plot: Dr. Martin Harris (Liam Neeson) wakes up with his life being stolen from him and no one believes what he says.
Who Harris Actually Is
The payoff for finding out who Harris is does make sense in the end. The character of Harris is shown to be somewhat simple, he's a biochemist, but it turns out there is a reason he was able to do the cool stuff before he found out. What makes it interesting to me is that it involves something to do with the mind.
Corn
What is it that Harris has to make sure doesn't get into the wrong hands? Corn that can grow in any weather. I felt it was such a let down as the rest of the movie was kick ass. It does make sense why that's a target but it wasn't as good as what could have been.
Liam Neeson's Performance
His performance in this movie was very good. He did a good job as Harris and also when his character changed. Liam is a very good action star as well as showing real emotions and this mixes well. The brief clips of him having sex with his wife in the shower seemed a little weird to put in this movie.
Final Thoughts
This is a very well done movie. It is great on the action and the plot is engaging. It keeps you guessing until the end. Unknown is a mystery but those who want a little romance (no, I'm not referring just to Harris' wife) and action (the action scenes are done very well). Liam Neeson fans should be pleased with this movie.
The Wedding of River Song (jashycam 34)
My VERY brief 'review' of the Doctor Who finale.
If that version does not work, try this one:
Friday, September 30, 2011
Thor (2011)
Title: Thor
Director: Kenneth Branagh
Director (Post-Credits): Joss Whedon
Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Anthony Hopkins, and Natalie Portman
Rated: PG-13
Released: 2011
Rating: 3.5/5
Oscars: N/A
Basic Plot: Thor is sent to Earth to learn humility.
The Realms in this Movie
Each of the three realms shown in this movie are very distinct. Asgard has a combination of futuristic and ancient technologies and beliefs. Jötunheim is a vast ice wasteland where there seems to be hardly any technology. Earth is modern day (New Mexico, USA). I like that each realm is very different from the other.
Post-Credits
The scene that appears after the credits does a good job at giving me a reason to see The Avengers movie (not that this is my first time thinking about seeing it). It is very short but I would suggest waiting after the credits to see it.
The Romance
Any romance in a movie is usually done unrealistically and/or because the main lead HAS to have a romantic interest. Fortunately, the romance in this movie is only the former. Thor falling in love with Jane Foster seems to be needed so he'd learn humility (as this is given as a reason to why he becomes a better person). However, it just seems to happen way too quickly. The payoff for the romance is a good one, though.
Final Thoughts
This was a very fun movie. How does it compare to the comic book version of Thor? I haven't read any of the comics with him in them, so I don't know. The graphics for this movie are very well done and help build an atmosphere to each realm. I am sad I didn't see this one in theaters.
Director: Kenneth Branagh
Director (Post-Credits): Joss Whedon
Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Anthony Hopkins, and Natalie Portman
Rated: PG-13
Released: 2011
Rating: 3.5/5
Oscars: N/A
Basic Plot: Thor is sent to Earth to learn humility.
The Realms in this Movie
Each of the three realms shown in this movie are very distinct. Asgard has a combination of futuristic and ancient technologies and beliefs. Jötunheim is a vast ice wasteland where there seems to be hardly any technology. Earth is modern day (New Mexico, USA). I like that each realm is very different from the other.
Post-Credits
The scene that appears after the credits does a good job at giving me a reason to see The Avengers movie (not that this is my first time thinking about seeing it). It is very short but I would suggest waiting after the credits to see it.
The Romance
Any romance in a movie is usually done unrealistically and/or because the main lead HAS to have a romantic interest. Fortunately, the romance in this movie is only the former. Thor falling in love with Jane Foster seems to be needed so he'd learn humility (as this is given as a reason to why he becomes a better person). However, it just seems to happen way too quickly. The payoff for the romance is a good one, though.
Final Thoughts
This was a very fun movie. How does it compare to the comic book version of Thor? I haven't read any of the comics with him in them, so I don't know. The graphics for this movie are very well done and help build an atmosphere to each realm. I am sad I didn't see this one in theaters.
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