Dedicated to Jordan who is a great roleplayer and friend
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I was back in my house and it felt different. Everything felt different now so the fact that my house felt less like a home didn't worry me. My dogs, who it seemed used to be connected to my very soul, were now nervous around me. They must be able to tell that their owner had gone through a transformation. While they were scared now, they'd soon realize that I had changed for the better.
I had arrived home after a hectic work day. Luckily Jack hadn't called me to help with a new case. I felt like I could take on any case without resorting to madness, but I had other things to worry about. It had been a few days and Beverly still walked.
For some reason there was a hate that grew within me whenever we talked. I kept seeing her destroying my relationship with Hannibal. I had finally found peace in a man and yet she kept trying to get in the way.
Subtle things. Little things.
Beverly asked about my therapy sessions with Hannibal and I was kind yet distant in my replies. If she noticed anything, it wouldn't matter soon. It wouldn't matter that she was flirting more openly with me. No woman was as kind as she was without reason. I should've seen that sooner.
I walked to my fireplace and leaned against it. The feel of it meant something more to me now. It was now a way to kill and not just something that provided warmth Thoughts flashed through my mind as I finalized what would happen to Beverly. While her dying inside my house would be fitting, I didn't want any evidence linking me to her death. And Jack's prying gaze would then end up on me sooner than later.
I took out my cell and looked at it. An idea was forming in my head and I was nervous about following it to its conclusion. Not because I thought killing Beverly was wrong, but I was worried I'd mess up and disappoint Hannibal.
Gathering up my courage I called Beverly.
"Hello?" She asked.
"Hi, Beverly." I said, my voice sounding pained.
"Are you doing okay, Will? You've seemed a little...different lately." Damn that prying bitch.
"Alana's death has hit me hard. But I have been getting better." I had to hold back any mention of Hannibal, the man who was saving me from madness. I didn't want to give her any indication that she was going to be walking into a trap. Beverly was clever and would take any reference to Hannibal as confirmation that I could now see her true colors.
"I don't know if being able to solve cases means you're getting better."
"It means I have something to cling onto. To distract me until I get over her death."
"And are you getting over her death?"
"It doesn't feel like it did when she died." I replied truthfully. "But I still don't feel comfortable being alone tonight."
"Will, I-" Beverly replied, obviously confused.
"Not like that." I said and gave a half-hearted attempt at a chuckle. "I'm just worried what I will do to myself. I've been having these thoughts lately. I don't think I'd ever do anything, but it'd be good to have someone that I trust to make sure I stay safe."
Someone I trust. That wouldn't be Beverly. But I needed her to worry about me so she wouldn't see her death coming. She wouldn't know that I could see her now.
"I'll be able to come over in a little under an hour. Will you be safe until then?" She asked.
Good, she was worried. She wouldn't see anything coming.
"Yes." I said.
"Goodbye." Beverly replied.
"Goodbye."
After I hung up I felt some relief. The first stage of the plan was over. I hadn't messed up and all I would have to do is continue the performance when she arrived. Beverly would put on her face of actually caring about me, but that would be a lie.
I had only a short time to prepare for her.
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I quickly finished putting on my clothes as I heard Beverly's car. It would be a short time until she knocked on my door and then the plan would be close to completion. I glanced at my dogs who looked more nervous than normal, but Winston still walked up to me.
He lifted up his head and I scratched behind one of his ears. He knew everything was fine, or else he was a very good actor. In either case, he wasn't going to alert Beverly. Winston cared about me and wouldn't want to see me leave.
Beverly knocked on my door and I opened it for her. I quickly made sure that my face was pained as I was opening the door. I had done it right since my victim's face showed concern. I stepped out of the way so that she could enter. Winston sniffed her and then wagged his tail.
"That's Winston." I said as she bent down to pet him.
"He's a good boy." She said, taking on the sweet tone that most people use to talk to dogs. Treating dogs like they were children and not creatures with feelings. "Where did you get him from?"
"He's a stray, figured a home was better than living on the streets."
"You're a kind man." Beverly said as she stopped petting Winston and stood up. "And I am here for you while you try to figure everything out."
"I know." I said and knew that she was lying. The only reason she cared was to learn more about me and put me under a microscope. I was an oddity and only Hannibal saw me for what I truly was: a person that needed privacy. "And I am glad you are here when Alana can't be."
"It isn't your fault Alana is dead." She replied.
"I know." I said, trying to pretend that I had gotten over Alana's death. I pretended that I was recovering so that Beverly wouldn't be more worried than I wanted her to be. "I thought we could go on a walk."
"No wine?" She joked with a disappointed expression. Of course she wanted to seduce me.
"You're a friend, I didn't want you to get the wrong impression." I had to stop myself from screaming at her that she wasn't Alana. That she could never be Alana or take her place.
"I understand." Beverly said and looked out the window. It was dark and there was a very light snowfall starting.
I picked up a flashlight and opened the door for Beverly. As she went out of my house I looked to my dogs. I was warning them, with my eyes alone, to not bark or warn her that something was amiss. That all wasn't like it had been before.
I closed the door after I had exited my house. I locked it merely from habit and not because I was afraid anyone would try and break in. I wouldn't be gone long, anyways.
"So where to?" Beverly asked.
"I figured a good walk in the woods would be refreshing." I answered.
"Isn't that dangerous?"
"Just means that when we get back we'll feel better to be alive."
I turned on my flashlight and my victim followed me into the woods. There was no moon tonight and so the woods were darker than they had been in my dreams. As I wasn't dreaming, I knew where and when I was. I knew what I was doing and so I'd make Hannibal proud. I'd prove to him that I was recovering and becoming a better person all at the same time.
"So you're scaring yourself to feel better now?" Beverly finally asked.
"Yes." I replied and noticed her walking had become slower. "Don't tell me you're getting too scared now. We're already deep in the woods."
"I'm not scared about myself, I'm worried about you."
"We're just taking a walk in the woods. There's no danger to us."
"You've been different lately." She stated. I turned to my left to look at her face. She didn't appear afraid, just determined.
Beverly Katz knew.
I swung the flashlight to her head and she moved just in time. In the precious few seconds it took to pull out my gun, Beverly had gone out of view. I didn't want to pick up the flashlight as she could use that time to attack me. I doubt she'd kill me since she thought too much for that.
"I've been myself!" I yelled out. Turning around I tried to think of where she would go. I once knew her as a friend and I could empathize with anyone. That is why I would be the one to win this fight.
Upon realizing that I couldn't hope to find her without the flashlight, I bent down and she kicked my side. I rolled over and pulled out my knife as my gun left my hand. I preferred a knife anyways. Better to slice open necks with.
I pretended to hesitate about my decision to kill Beverly so that I would have a more solid plan of attack. I couldn't rely on surprise any longer.
"I'm trying to help you, Will!" Beverly said as she pointed her gun at me. Not at my head, but at my shoulder. She wanted to wound me, make sure I wasn't a danger for a long time, and let me be ruled by her.
"You're trying to control me. You're trying to keep me away from Hannibal!" I hissed.
Beverly's look of confusion and wavering of her hands gave me just enough time. I leapt up, pushed her against a tree, and slit her throat.
If I was the man I was before, I'd have thought her last look at me was one of betrayal. But I knew it to be one of regret because she had lost.
I didn't react outwardly to the blood splattering onto my face. It felt refreshing and I felt proud of myself. I had made Hannibal proud and now Alana could be at peace. If Hannibal wanted to continue this form of therapy, I would allow it. It had opened a part of me that I had been afraid of before.
I was free. I was my own design.
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